What is Permissive Parenting, How to Notice it

Permissive parenting is a style of parenting characterised by a lack of clear boundaries and expectations, and a focus on the child’s emotional needs and wants. This approach to parenting has gained increasing popularity over the last few decades, but it has also been met with criticism from some parenting experts. While there are some potential benefits to a permissive parenting style, there are also potential drawbacks that parents should be aware of before deciding to adopt this approach. Permissive parenting can have a long-term impact on children’s behaviour and well-being, so it is important for parents to understand the implications of this parenting style before making a decision.

What is Permissive Parenting?

Permissive parenting is a style of parenting characterized by a lack of clear boundaries and expectations, and a focus on the child’s emotional needs and wants. Permissive parenting is a form of child-rearing that is very focused on meeting a child’s immediate needs, without paying much attention to their long-term needs. This type of parenting is highly responsive and indulgent, providing lots of affection, material goods, and caretaking, but without much structure, guidance, or discipline. Permissive parents are generally very responsive to their child’s wants and needs, and they often go out of their way to make their children happy. This parenting style is driven by a desire to avoid creating frustration or disappointment in the child, and to avoid setting strict or difficult limits.

Permissive Parenting Tips

When adopting a permissive parenting style, it is important to try to strike a balance between being overly restrictive and being too permissive. Parents who are overly strict will likely create resentment in their children, whereas those who are too permissive will not help their children develop the skills and independence they need to succeed in life. Some tips for permissive parents include.

Impact of Permissive Parenting on Children

While some children might respond well to permissive parenting as toddlers and young children, others may show signs of being negatively impacted as they grow up. Children need boundaries and structure in their lives as they grow, in order to develop a sense of autonomy and self-control. Trying to avoid setting boundaries and being overly indulgent as a parent can actually lead to a child having poorer self-control, more behavioural issues, and a decreased sense of self-efficacy in the long run. This can have a significant impact on a child’s mental health, academic achievements, and even romantic relationships as adults. Permissive parenting can also cause children to become overly dependent on their parents for approval and affirmation, which can lead to a larger sense of loneliness and social isolation. When combined with a lack of boundaries, permissive parenting can also lead to disrespectful and aggressive child behaviour.

How to Avoid Permissive Parenting

If you feel like your parenting is becoming too permissive, or you want to avoid permissive parenting in the future, there are a few steps you can take to put more structure and discipline into your child-rearing. First, you should try to understand why you are permissive. Are you trying to avoid disappointing your child? Are you scared of setting boundaries and having conflicts with your child? Are you trying to be a “perfect” parent? If so, then you may want to seek therapy to try to address these underlying issues. Once you understand why you are permissive, you can work to correct it by setting clear boundaries and expectations, and being consistent with enforcing them. You can also try to give your child more opportunities for independence and self-control, and encourage them to solve their own problems instead of relying on you to solve them for them.

Alternatives to Permissive Parenting

If you feel like your parenting style is too permissive, there are many alternatives you can try. As mentioned above, one way to avoid permissive parenting is to set stricter boundaries and expectations and to be consistent with enforcing them. Another way to avoid permissive parenting is to focus more on helping your child develop their skills and autonomy. This could include helping your child learn to solve their own problems, encouraging them to try new things, and giving them more responsibility.

Long-term Effects of Permissive Parenting

While permissive parenting might seem like a good idea in the short term, in the long term, it can have a significant negative impact on the child. Using a permissive parenting style can actually cause your child to have poorer self-control, more behavioural issues, and a decreased sense of self-efficacy as they grow up. Permissive parenting can also cause children to become overly dependent on their parents for approval and affirmation, which can lead to a larger sense of loneliness and social isolation. When combined with a lack of boundaries, permissive parenting can also lead to disrespectful and aggressive child behaviour.

Strategies for Avoiding Permissive Parenting

If you want to avoid permissive parenting, the first step is recognizing the signs that your parenting style may be too permissive. If you recognise any of these signs in your parenting style, it is important to put more structure and discipline into your child-rearing. You should try to set clear and consistent boundaries, provide your child with ample opportunities for autonomy, and encourage your child to solve their own problems. Hopefully, these steps will help you avoid permissive parenting and lead to happier and more successful children in the long run.